As I previously covered in this post, men and women – for reasons of basic biology – have different genetic imperatives. When I say “genetic imperative” I simply mean the most efficient method possible for propagating one’s own DNA–or, the most efficient biological self-preservation strategy.
Male Genetic Imperative
Men can produce sperm constantly throughout the year pausing only for the refactory period which is the period of time after ejaculation when they cannot physically ejaculate again which can be as little as 10 or 15 minutes so the male genetic imperative is very simple – have sex with lots of fertile women.
Female Genetic Imperatives
The male strategy does not work for women as they can only give birth once a year regardless of how many men they have sex with. They also have a limited number of eggs which run out at a certain age so, in the sexual marketplace, eggs are expensive and sperm is cheap.
Add in the extra burden of childcare and the female genetic imperatives become:
1) Seek high quality alpha male DNA and physical protection and security for both self and child.
2) Seek a partner who can provide financial security for self and children. Prevent other women from diluting such arrangement.
In other words, the two imperatives respectively secure the need for:
1) Strength, dominance, protection, physical security (the domain of the alpha male)
2) Material provision (the domain of the provider male)
However, a woman does not necessarily need to get both genetic imperatives met by the same man, and women often don’t.
This brings us to a cautionary Christmas tale about a provider male.
Earlier this month Tao Hsiao, 38, was shopping with his girlfriend in Xuzhou, Jiangsu province, east China for five hours – yes FIVE HOURS.
As I mentioned in this post, the reason women love to shop is based on their role during the hunter-gatherer era as mostly gathers and, when removed of their historic duties in the modern era, this need comes out in other forms like shopping.
The reward centres of women’s brains are activated when shopping in a way quite unlike men. The clinical term for this is “oniomania” from the Greek words onios “for sale” and mania “insanity” but perhaps better known to you and me as shopping therapy – shopping for the sake of the pleasure of shopping regardless of whether they actually need the things that they are buying.
Women will keep going like a rat hitting the lever for the reward pellet to the point of exhaustion – hence the term ‘shop until you drop’ – except that in this case the reward is a dopamine rush to the brain and not a pellet.
Well after five hours Tao Hsiao had had enough and demanded to go home. He complained that they already had more bags than they could carry but she insisted on going into one more shop where there was a special offer on shoes.
And this brings us to one of the dangers of being a provider male. Strong, dominant men (the domain of the alpha male) don’t get nagged by women. Provider males do.
So, when he responded by saying that she already had enough shoes, more shoes that she could wear in a lifetime and it was pointless buying any more, her response was predictable.
It descended into a screaming match.
She started shouting at him accusing him of being a skinflint and of spoiling Christmas.
The screaming match ended when Tao threw the bags to the floor and jumped over the balcony, smashing into Christmas decorations on his way down before hitting the floor seven stories below.
He was killed immediately by the impact of the fall.
The incident was blamed on how “this time of year can be very stressful for many people”.
Really? Does Christmas kill? Well no it doesn’t but if you find yourself on the wrong side of Sex 2.0 dynamics the result can often be fatal like in Tao’s case.
Christmas does not kill but 2.0 sure does.
Further Reading : Understanding the friend zone and why men don’t have one