Some red flags to watch out for :
1. The opposite sex is the enemy
A person who is un-aware of the Sex 2.0 framework and the failings of that framework will resort to constantly blaming the opposite sex in the face of repeated relationships failure rather than examining the failings of the relationship framework that they are using.
When a relationship comes to and end, their knee jerk response is to blame the other person.
Repeated blaming of the ex leads to the attitude that “all men are bastards” or “all women are bitches”. A partner that has nothing but bad things to say about their ex-partners is a clear red flag.
Chances are it is you that they are going to be speaking about in less than glowing terms in the not-too-distant future.
This classic blame misplacement allows them to keep hold of their faulty mind map about the way that sexual relationships are supposed to work.
2. Being Taken For Granted
A lack of effort by your partner when it comes to grooming perhaps? A lack of imagination or willingness to please between the sheets after you become accustomed to each other?
Establishing a monopoly agreement (whether it is to be the guaranteed sole provider of sex or anything else) can lead to less effort or consideration being given.
After all if a person knows that, regardless of how poorly they performs as a partner, that they have undivided loyalty it can serve to remove incentive. This can manifest itself in many even more subtle ways like being sparse with praise or appreciation for acts of kindness.
3. Amateur Detective
Ahhh, the twin headed monster, jealousy and possessiveness. Checking each other’s text messages, facebook status, email? Acting like a dick towards somebody engaging in a social interaction towards your beloved simply because they have the same genitalia as you or having your partner do the same?
What a shame it is to be that person.
To allow love for one person to turn you into a bitter, insecure and angry person. To constantly live in fear and never be able to truly enjoy your relationship.
Not familiarity in the sense that I have already mentioned – being taken for granted – I mean when two people (who might start off in a passionate sexual relationship) end up in a loving relationship that is far more brotherly / sisterly and mostly sexless.
5. Shaming and judging of others
Do you or your partner judge, shame or gossip about other people sexually when it is really none of your business? And no, just because it is about someone you know / a friend / a relative does not mean it is your business. Whether other people chose to follow the Sex 2.0 deal or not is up to them,
The most obvious shaming words being slut, whore, faggot or dyke but this kind of coercion can be far more subtle. Like treating your single friends with condescending sympathy, telling them that “Awww don’t worry you will find someone and settle down” and generally acting like there is something terribly wrong with them for being single.
6. Your partner’s friends and / or family are controlling
Perhaps your partner’s mother does not approve of you because she does not see you as “marriage material”. Perhaps she sabotages the relationship by telling your partner behind closed doors and well away from you that you are “not right” or “not loving enough”.
Perhaps your partner’s close friends are fake friendly with you whilst secretly hoping that you break up. There’s another Sex 2.0 red flag right there.
7. Tame-the-alpha is being played
One of the curious things about the sexual marketplace is that women are attracted to alpha males but crave security.
In order to feel secure, some women feel the need to tame their man. They want a bad boy that is a good boy “just for them”. Result? Tame the alpha.
This ridiculous game does not just get played out in the form of extreme alpha-dom being reigned in a but even males who are moderately or even a little alpha, strong or independent will find themselves being tested, their commitment questioned until they are wrestled into a position of submission and totally de-clawed.
The result of this is of course women end up with what they never were attracted to in the first place. A tame beta male.
8. Worrying about “the one”
This can take many forms including talks about “where this relationship is going”, pressure to marry, couples reaching an “either we get married or we split up” crossroads ultimatum.
Oddly enough this scrabble to gain a nominal sense of permanence – a promise of always and forever – can end up in the demise of the relationship.
If you are experiencing one or more of any of these red flags in your relationships on any kind of regular basis, Sex 2.0 might not be for you.
How many of these do you recognise?
Further reading : The Sex 2.0 Genetic Imperatives